ARCHIVE:
05182011

From the Sheeplog Experts...

Chauncey

Chauncey

TOPIC: "Investment Strategy"

When I decided to invest in the stock market I thought it would be a good idea to read up on it. But it was hopeless. The terminology was mystifying.

Also mystifying was why so many investors and advisors would take their cues from an index called Standard and POOR. Where’s Standard and RICH? Or better, I’d really like to find Standard and Obscenely Wealthy. Seriously, if you’re named Poor don’t name your index after yourself. That move alone told me not to hitch my wagon to those guys.

My friend Walter fancies himself a stock trading whiz and when he found out I wanted to get into the market he offered advice. And offered advice. And offered advice. He agreed that reading and studying the trends was overrated and told me he’d long ago eschewed investment magazines.

I soon found out he’d actually CHEWED his investment magazines, because he lost everything in the stock market and that was all he had left for food.

For my own investment strategy, I decided to go with superstition and guesswork.

I tossed a pinch of salt over my shoulder and another over my shank. Then I stood still and listened. I had no idea what I was listening for but in no time I heard a voice!

It bleated, "NA-A-aasdaq!"

First I thought, omigosh it’s that duck selling insurance. But more voices joined in and came closer. Yep, they were repeating, "Na-a-aaaaasdaq!" Soon there was an absolute din of voices crying, "Naaaaaaasdaq!" over and over again.

Then they appeared before me, a huge flock of sheep acting like themselves. One sheep, tired of saying the same ol’ sheep thing, had tried out a new linguistic creation and naturally all the sheep followed. 'Turns out naaaasdaq was a very sheepish thing to say.

But I’m sure it was a message for me because not one sheep, not one living thing in the meadow, was saying Dow Jones and certainly not Standard and Poor. Nope. The voices have spoken. From now on I’m NASDAQ all the way.

Unless eschewing becomes necessary.

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