ARCHIVE:
02072011

From the Sheeplog Experts...

Old Goat

Old Goat

TOPIC: "When Things Get Hard"

When you get older it seems like everything gets harder. Running is harder. Lifting heavy stuff is harder. Reading words on a page or screen is harder.

Also, your skin gets harder; your fingernails, your hair (coat, if you’re a goat) and your bones get harder.

Lately, I keep hearing concerns about "an aging population." Hey, no need for concern. Much can be accomplished with lotion.

Yep, lotion and gelatin. Lotion softens the skin. Gelatin is good for the bones and nails (hooves, if you’re a goat—although some people seem to feel like they’re developing hooves on their fingers and toes as they get on, and let me stress right here, if that’s your situation, don’t try to continue to play the piano!).

Now let's not get confused. Lotion and gelatin are fine for making harder become softer. But not for making harder become EASIER.

Lotion makes running slippery! Don’t be a fool. If you use lotion for running you better hope you’ve been eating your gelatin to soften up those bones for the inevitable crash. Please, no lotion on the eyes, either. Some of you younger ones think I don’t need to say this? Ha! You wait. Your day is coming.

However, gelatin might be another story.

Lifting gelatin instead of weights, for instance, could be good, light exercise plus you can eat it when you’re done. I also can conceive of the possibilities for seeing better through gelatin cubes …but you’ll need to look fast on warm days. Again, to the younger ones: I get your snickering, but you know what? When you’re older you don’t care what you look like peering through gelatin cubes. (Just as you didn’t when you were four.)

Here’s a wisdom tidbit: Gelatin is favored by those at the two ends of life—children and elderly. In those middle years, it’s simply to be tolerated. But it MUST BE tolerated since you are surrounded by children and elderly, which is something to notice for more reasons than gelatin.

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