From the Sheeplog Experts...

Chauncey in shades


TOPIC: "How to Use $25"

I found $25 on the street yesterday! I couldn’t believe it. I looked around for a hidden camera. I thought maybe this was a test of some kind. But no camera, no string pulling the wad of bills away as I reached for it. Best of all, it was just out in the middle of the street, not in front of a store or a car or in a wallet. So there was no place for an honest person to turn it in.

I tried to think of its anonymous rightful owner who was probably very sad when he realized it was gone. I tried, but I was too excited: FREE MONEY!!

Next, my dilemma was deciding what to do with it. Putting wrinkled bills in the bank is just too weird. Somehow they don’t look right with a deposit slip.

I didn’t really need it. I remembered my cousin just got laid off and had mentioned she was down to $5. But after all, $25 isn’t enough to pay rent or anything. Besides, SHE didn’t find it. She wasn’t walking down the right street at the right time and being terribly observant as I was. She should have her own luck.

I could buy food with it and take it to the local food pantry. But they get lots of donations. They’d say thanks, but they wouldn’t make a big deal of my generosity. I hate when you give something and don’t get a certificate.

But if I gave it to the symphony they would print my name in the program. I’d be listed under the “Miniature Friends - $10-50” category. …along with the “Piano students of Mrs. Frishmill.” Again, not that gratifying.

Anyway, given to the symphony, it would about cover one violinist’s dry cleaning, and while that violinist would certainly appreciate the help, I doubt he’d seek me out to say so. Then, too, next concert I went to I’d miss the whole first set because I’d be trying to figure out whose suit owed its joy to my largesse.

Finally, I used common sense. Obviously the money was meant for me. I found it. God knows I didn’t need it so he must have intended for me to just have a good time with it. Therefore, I took the $25 and blew it! Because I could.

I spent it many times over, actually. I got a funky pair of sneakers I’d never buy with my own hard-earned money; pizza and beer; golf balls; two albums off iTunes and a $40 gift certificate for the hardware store.

I must’ve deserved to find that money, because I didn’t need it and was able to waste it so well.